Body Language Article
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"
Can You Hear Your Body Talking?"
- by Kevin Hogan -
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Can
You Hear Your Body Talking?
Your
body language will boost you to the top or keep you among the
majority of people in the middle and bottom. You have less
than 10 seconds and realistically closer to four seconds to
make a good first impression on those you come into contact
with. There is a world of research that clearly indicates that
you will be judged professionally and personally in the first
few seconds of your meeting someone for the first time. In
fact your first impression is recorded and is used as a yard
stick for all future communication by those whom you meet.
Whatever that first impression is going to be on your part,
you want it to be intentional and on purpose.
Let's
take a look at how to talk your way to the top with your body.
Most people are completely unaware of just how much their body
says and how it often contradicts what the words are saying!
There are numerous elements of what we might call body
language. They include your physical features both changeable
and unchangeable, your gestures and signals that you send to
others at the conscious and unconscious level and the space
that you use when communicating with others. In this chapter
we will touch on all of these important areas of body
language.
What
You Look Like Really Talks!
Let's
begin with our physical appearance. Here are some astounding
facts that will give you pause for thought when you consider
how important appearance is in getting to the top.
Your
perceived level of attractiveness by other people will be a
significant benefit or detriment in your life. It isn't fair
but it is true. People who get to the top learn how to deal
with less than perfect physical features and work with what
they can. Before we consider just how to increase your face
value look at the results of some fascinating studies about
physical appearance.
The
Power of Physical Appearance:
- Did
you know that in university settings, professors who are
considered physical attractive by students are considered
better teachers on whole than unattractive professors?
Attractive professors are also more likely to be asked for
help on problems. These same attractive professors also tend
to receive positive recommendations from other students to
take their classes and also are less likely to receive the
blame when a student receives a failing grade! (Romano and
Bordieri 1989)
- Did
you know that marriage and dating decisions are often made
with great weight placed on physical attractiveness? A wide
variety of research indicates that men will often reject
women who are lacking (in their opinion) in positive
physical features. Women on the other hand place less
significance on a man's physical attractiveness in
considering him for a date or marriage. (studies by R.E.
Baber)
- Did
you know that in studies done on college campuses, it has
been proven that attractive females (attraction as perceived
by the professors) receive significantly higher grades than
male students or relatively unattractive females? (studies
by J.E. Singer)
There
is more evidence that shows you must make the most of what you
have physically.
Among
strangers, individuals perceived as unattractive in physical
appearance are generally undesirable for any interpersonal
relationship! (studies by D. Byrne, O. London, K. Reeves)
In one
significant study of 58 unacquainted men and women in a social
setting we learned that after a first date, 89% of the people
who wanted a second date decided to do so because of
attractiveness of the partner! (Brislin and Lewis)
In the
persuasion process, attractive females are far more convincing
than females perceived as unattractive. (Mills and Aronson)
Among
American women, the size of a woman's bust is significant to
how both American men and women perceive the woman. Women with
a "medium" sized bust are considered to be more likable and
have greater personal appeal than women with a large or small
bust. Women with a small bust are perceived as more
intelligent, competent, and moral. Women with a large bust are
generally perceived as less intelligent and less competent. (Kleinke,
Staneski, 1980)
In yet
another study, we find that young men who are obese are
generally considered to be slothful and lazy. Both men and
women who are obese are generally perceived to have
personality characteristics that place them at a disadvantage
in social and business settings. (Worsley, 1981)
Can
You Change Your Appearance?
Study
after study reveals that how you look is critical to someone's
first impression of you. So what can you do to change how you
look? You can't change everything about your physical
appearance but you can definitely make changes that will give
you a booster shot at going to the top in your business and
your personal life.
Research studies tell us that the "exposure principle"
increases our "face value." Specifically, the exposure
principle says that the more often you are seen by someone the
more attractive and intelligent you appear to them. If you
weren't gifted with a Cindy Crawford or Tom Cruise face then
it's time for you to take advantage of the exposure principle.
If you
don't have the advantage of being "seen" time after time by a
person or a group, then you must make the most of what you
have. In other words you want to look as good as you possibly
can on every given day. Because of the significance of body
image and weight you must do what you can to keep your body
weight down and your body in shape for your overall image to
be as good as it can be.
Your
teeth will tell a tale as well. If your teeth are yellow and
look like you just ate, your face value is obviously greatly
reduced. Do everything you can to keep your teeth pearly white
and you will be perceived as more attractive. (You've already
seen the benefits of the perception of attractiveness.) When
you watch the news tonight on TV, look at the teeth of every
news anchor, weather person and sports announcer. They all
have beautiful white teeth. There's a reason for that and that
is positive impression management. You do the same and you
will have a boost on the way to the top.
Hair is
significant to how you assess other people isn't it?
Hairstyles can say a great deal about a person. Women with
short and stylish hair tend to be perceived as more
professional. Older women with longer hair tend to be
perceived as women who really wish they were much younger. Men
who are balding and try any of several ways to "cover up" look
as though (and probably do) suffer from self esteem
challenges. Men who have long hair tend to be indifferent
toward what others think of them. Men whose hair is trimmed,
styled and short tend to be perceived as professional. What is
your hairstyle saying about you?
You've
now heard some of the important facts about enhancing your
personal appearance. Remember to keep aware of the awesome
power of body language in every communication and use it to
enhance your face value.
To learn more about decoding body language click here!
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